Editor's note: This is part two of the Ending the Stigma series on mental health. Read the rest of the series here.

NAMPA, Idaho – James Nelson's nickname as a freshman was Old Man.

The Northwest Nazarene men's basketball player was known for moving methodically, reading long non-fiction books in his free time and for becoming easily withdrawn and almost anti-social.

While the nickname was light-hearted, the behavior was a mask to cover up a lifetime of anxiety that quickly spiraled out of control during the 2018-19 basketball season.

"I started having panic attacks in November, December until the end of the season," he said. "I experienced a lot of stress that I wasn't able to manage and that caused me to experience more anxiousness, and since I wasn't equipped to handle that it rocked me to my core."

While Nelson tried to keep everything inside of himself, withdrawing further, his teammates couldn't help but notice something was going on.

They knew he wasn't sleeping well and it showed up in his practicing and his play on the court.

"I was in a bad place," he said. "I felt hopeless. I had this huge burden of responsibilities, but I couldn't even control or manage my own health. I still had to travel, go to class, condition, practice – it was a lot to deal with. So, it all piled on."

The anxiety came to a head when the panic attacks became severe enough to cause him to miss a road trip to Montana State Billings.

The break gave Nelson a chance to step away from everything and find some motivation to finish off the rest of the season.

It also helped spur regular visits to a counselor to help work through the anxiety he was feeling.

The reaction from the locker room and his coaches was one of surprise, but also support and love.

"I'm definitely proud of the guys for responding that way, because I think there is a little bit of that that is counter-cultural to their age and demographic," NNU men's basketball coach Paul Rush said. "It is something we work really hard to foster within our team, but it's not perfect."

It was also a moment of learning.

"I've never had a panic attack, so I don't know what that feels like," NNU men's basketball player Sam Roth said. "I think I was pretty uneducated and maybe insensitive. I just remember thinking of different ways to help, but in reality, I didn't understand what he was going through."

Nelson himself wasn't entirely sure what he was going through.

While he was struggling to finish out his freshman year, he said his ego and pride fed into his anxiety and ultimately aided his decision to transfer from NNU to Dixie State in St. George, Utah.

Nelson never played for the Trailblazers, suffering not only from a back injury but also a lesson that the grass isn't always greener on the other side.

He didn't have a locker, didn't get to go to team meals and was basically a team manager.

It left Nelson unsure of what the future held.

He kept in contact with his old teammates and eventually returned to NNU.

"I believe that after a year there, for better or worse, I have a different perspective on school and college athletics," he said. "Dixie is a (NCAA) D-I school and there is a lot of glamor to that, but for me at least, the community, the people, the staff, the coaches and the players are what makes (NNU) an incredible place.

"That was illustrated and illuminated to me when I was gone for a year."

Nelson still has anxiety and he still has panic attacks, but thanks to a lot of time spent with counselors and his changed perspective on life he is headed in a new direction.

"We hung out a couple of nights ago and he was telling us that he feels like he is capable of doing things now," Roth said. "He has an extra gear in practice and he attributes that to his attitude. He is thankful to be here now.

"It is really good to have him back. He seems like he is right back to where he was before as a teammate. We all really loved him."